I am not my behavior.

Not sure how I haven't pulled in over two months. Not sure if it's finally done this time. It's been more of a struggle to stop, and I have to actually TRY. I used to just have to make it through one day pull-free and I could go weeks, even months without pulling even one hair. This time, I've had to fight. I've had to fight hard for it this time. Each day is a struggle. I have more stress in my life now than I ever have had before. But maybe that's a good thing. Maybe in the future I'll be able to tell myself "you got through it that time without pulling, now you can get through this". My hairdresser has trichotillomania too. I was referred to her by a friend for my hair extensions (she didn't know I pulled). But I needed a good hairdresser. When I went, I told her all about my problem. She had it too. What are the odds? Now she had only had it for a few months when I had met her. I went back today, and she said my hair was the healthiest it had ever been. We trimmed off all the dead at the bottom, and yes, it's shorter, but its healthy. And it feels great. So now I'm ready to grow it out this time. Long. I want long hair. I'm determined this time. I have this very blonde hair (that used to be down to my booty when I was younger), and I want that again. And even though I have this beautiful two inch regrowth on the top of my head that sticks straight up, I know it will one day be long like the rest of it.